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Men: Now 45% Less Stupid Looking
Submitted by Scott Bergstrom on 03/20/2008 09:16:02 AM
It’s about damn time. Menswear is finally getting a little dressier, or so says the Denver Post – which, you know, is like the #1 fashion publication in the whole world. And that’s great, because frankly Denverism is sick and tired of this business casual BS. At New York’s fall fashion preview, designers such as Marc Jacobs, John Varvatos, Michael Kors, and Sean Combs (who has many fashion sins for which to repent) presented tailored clothing and even three-piece suits. Note to the men of Denver: there wasn’t a pair of pleated khakis anywhere. To stroll the streets of downtown Denver during lunch hour is to be visually assaulted by cheap suits, popped polo-shirt collars, flip-flops, and sports jerseys – thankfully, rarely on the same person. Where’s the pride, gentlemen? Where’s the sense of elegance that even our Depression-era grandfathers had? And when is the last time a woman went home with you from the bar because of your Elway jersey? Listen up, fellas: Flip-flops are for locker rooms. A sports jersey, unless you actually play for the team emblazoned on the front, is the adult male equivalent of a princess costume. And popped collars? If you didn’t just climb out of a smoking De Lorean, leave them in the 80’s where they belong, okay, McFly? |
Looking Less Stupid
it is often the unwritten guide, when shopping for clothes, "if it looks good on the mannequin, get what looks good!"
however, gentlemen, the fine art of stimulating conversation can not be stressed enough. don't know what to say?
read the paper, preferably the Wall Street Journal, it's more than just numbers and percentages.
READ A BOOK!!! i read one book a year, but i read a lot of book reviews which are also in the WSJ.
take a dance class or two, the ratio of women to men, in most of the classes i've taken, is easily 2:1 and with these ladies, the ice has already been broken and they already know your level of dance skill.
no expectations, just fun and getting to know one another. there is one dance instructor who has a "night out" as the final, again no expectations. in fact, i've been asked out by women more often through dance class or because they know i'm taking dance lessons. what woman doesn't like to be confidently held and deftly twirled, re-enacting a favorite movie scene, perhaps.
finally, always carry matches, regardless of how you may personally feel about smoking. a small box of wooden matches i have found to be slightly more romantic and easier to hold in your hand while lighting.
these three simple additions help to make me more than just a mannequin in a good suit. i'm no dummy
Not Jay Cutler?
What are you saying? Of course I thought I saw Jay Cutler about 26 times downtown last night, but are you telling me the overweight bald guy with his "Ming the Merciless" mustasche is just some goon trying to style himself in the fashion of of our 3rd rate QB?
You have broken my heart, Scott Bergstrom (or whatever your REAL name is!)! Happy Easter